So I was talking to my friend Natalie [~
hansoloqt] about how I happen to stare at my Spanish professor's boots during class since I can't understand a word he says (I mean, come one, it's Spanish 1... how am I supposed to know what "write down your birthday in Spanish" means when spoken in Spanish?). Being the creative gal she is, she turned it into a hilarious story I must share.
It was a dark and stormy night, and as Professor Alfonso packed up all of the little knick-knacks he religiously brought to class, the lightning flashed in the clouds, his back was lit up, forming a silohuette. As the storm raged on outside, his own personal thoughts bubbled and brewed in his mind. He had noticed one student in particular-a freshman- staring intently through the entire class period. He'd seen that look before, quite often in fact. It was a look he'd seen on many women after a disappointing night with him. That one look held something....it was in those womens' eyes. That look told him quite often that these women desired, longed for something more. Better? More satisfying? More likely than not. And in this student, he knew that she wasn't staring so intently out of a desire to learn more about the months and their spanish names.
No. It was something more, though what it was, he did not know. Perhaps she was contemplating the confusing schedules that most freshman struggle to adjust to. This wasn't high school after all. Classes changed sporadically and often times, professors would hold the class for hours more than was accustomed
Or else, perhaps this student, what was her name? Alfonso looked over to where this particular student sat, to help put a place to a face, and a face to a name. Ah yes! Emily! That is what she was called. An intense, shy creature
Snapping out of his thoughts by a crash of thunder, Alfonso jumped a bit; startled. He clipped his briefcase shut and made his way out the door. Little did he know what lay waiting in the shadows.
Emily was a very bright student, and thoroughly interested in many things; from dogs to nature to Elton John and John Lennon. And who can't forget the ever mighty brother in law, Billy Joel? Her "sister" as she refered to her friend Natalie, was very close, and they frequently is many concerts with Sir Elton.
But on this particular day, Emily becamse fascinated with a whole new area: shoes. Her spanish professor, Alfonso, as he was known, he had the strangest, most interesting shoes. He wore a pair of Beatle boots. Instantly, Emily dropped all thoughts of corsets and Borzois from her mind and stared in envy and awe of those magnificant boots. She made up her mind that those boots would be hers.
(Ignoring the fact she wears a size 6)
As Alfonso cringed under the constant cover of rain, thunder, and lightning, he heard a small squeak. Turning sideways, toward where he thought the noise was from, he saw a small object lying on the pavement. Glancing around, he dropped his suitcase next to the tire of his 1998 Ford Taurus Volvo Wagon Fiat Hybrid Rabbit (Hey, no one said that the car has to exist), and slowly made his way to the object. It appeared to be a pen of some sort. Being a Spanish teacher, Alfonso really had no knowledge of even basic art. It was, in fact, a broken Wacom Intuos tablet pen (who would ever leave a good one lying around!?). As he bent down to catch a better look, a fast shadow zipped across his back, and then everything became pitch black.
Emily had worked quickly and efficiently. Alfonso was tightly bound and gagged, just the way he likes it. Alfonso slowly awoke from the drugs that he been injected through his neck. As the image came into focus, he saw Emily standing over him. Instantly, his mind began to race. The twisted skank! Emily was quick to put that thought out of his mind though. She was quick. Grabbing her tablet pen (used specifically for these purposes), her instensely honed skills provided just what she needed; a speedy yet professional touch, Alfonso fell silent and the boots were her's. Alfonso was never seen or heard from again, but the last place he was found contained a professional picture of John Lennon.
El Fin!
(That's spanish for the end

)